Loaded And Lonely

Loaded and Lonely

written by: LunchboxRachel

@RachelMcLaugh

A soft glow
comes from my phone.
Wondering,
“Who’s it from?”

But, I know
it’s in my mind
because it’s past
your bedtime.

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, mind awake.

A soft rain
sends the day.
Run my hands
down your spine.

Sunrise
greets my eyes
only to find
a vacant bedside.

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, mind awake.

I’m aggressive, yet agonized.
Anxious, so I apologize.

Bashful and full of bliss
when I’m in your presence.

Bitter, you piece of shit.
Bored because I’m so cautious.
I’m grieving and guilty.
Happy for you but not for me.

Hysterical like an idiot.
You can’t rewind innocence.

Miserable and negative.
Paranoid, yet persistent.

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, mind awake.

Tell me what I’ve got to do.
How do I get to you?
Tell me what to prove.
Why so silent and so mute?

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, wide awake.

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LunchboxRachel

Vocalist Rachel McLaughlin is a Chicagoland native who is studying vocal performance at Valparaiso University. Accompanying her major, Rachel is pursuing a minor in public relations, as she believes it is a growing and important field in relation to the 21st century music industry. She has appeared as a soloist with the South Western Michigan Vocal Festival’s Honors Choir and with the Young Americans. Rachel has sung the national anthem at a wide variety of venues including: Indianapolis Motor Speedway, Four Winds Field, and Silver Beach Pavilion, to name a few.

Through her music and public relations experience she wants to provide the people of the world with an emotional connection and personal expression, all through music. By giving back through her performing and songwriting, she can share and honor the career development support she's received during this process.

Latest posts by LunchboxRachel (see all)

• Hey Veronica - June 16, 2018
• Loaded And Lonely - February 18, 2017
• The Crash - December 30, 2016