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Restless Mourn

written by: Alison Vail Fuller



a rain deluge usually comforts         wraps me in its song
only this morning its ominous tune
and hollow lyric wake me from my sleep

it is the 20th day of this new year
an inauguration day like no other

hide the flags!     
raise the blackest of umbrellas!         as they do little to shield us from this reign

I won’t tune in         just the thought of his image         turns my stomach

drenches my soul with dread

I remember this feeling
waking up at this fourth hour         into a new day

it resembles          that morning
the day after          my Husband dropped dead

the shock is not as great today
but the feeling of loss is palpable         overwhelming
weeping greets this day   
as I awaken into the nightmare of loss

for myself         for my sleeping daughters         and now for my country

instead of hope         I feel defeated         and I mourn
tomorrow I will rebound and find my fight again
my patriotism will shine as I march downtown with my comrades 
we will link arms and believe we can make a difference
a unified statement for decency, integrity, and compassion

this morning my tears blend         with the tears of the darkened Venice Sky

tomorrow we will open our umbrellas
and embrace our unity
and I will hear the rain’s mellifluous song

Alison Vail Fuller

Alison Vail Fuller

An author and poet, Alison attributes her passion for writing to an innate need. “For me, not writing is like not breathing,” she says. “It may cause depression, irregular heartbeat — or sudden death.” She divides her time between Southern California and her villa in Saipan, in the Mariana Islands. Alison is fluent in Chamorro and Nepali, and when not writing enjoys playing the crwth, painting ayahuasca visions, swimming and synchronized paragliding, and preparing traditional Lao cuisine for her daughters and friends.

The first anthology of her essays, fiction, and poems will be published by Bovrille Press in June 2018.
Alison Vail Fuller

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