I Went Back for Her… She Came Back for Me

I Went Back for Her… She Came Back for Me

written by: Lisa V

I don’t think my little girl ever thought
she had strengths.
Not back then.

She was quiet.
Bullied.
Trying to fit into places
that never made room for her.

But now, she knows.
She sees how far we’ve come.
And somehow,
she helps my adult self remember
that strength doesn’t always look forward.

Sometimes it looks like pausing.
Sometimes like stepping back
so healing can catch up.

I was fifty-three
sitting in RTT hypnotherapy
when my childhood stutter came back—
my body remembering before my mind caught up.

That’s when I realized
she was still there.
Still watching.
Still waiting.

Now, she reminds me
how far we’ve come.
She tells me it’s okay
to take steps backward
when we’re healing something
we never had language for before.

She marvels at us….
at how brave we’ve been
to walk into the past
without running away.

I would thank her
for being kind anyway.
For surviving the bullying.
For staying soft
in a world that told her to be smaller.

The adult me had to show her
What we built.
What we survived.
What we healed together.

Funny how it works.
You go back to rescue your little girl,
and one day
she stands tall
and rescues you right back.

Little girl…
I hear you now….

You don’t have to whisper anymore.
You don’t have to prove anything.
You don’t have to fight to belong.

Because I see you.
I choose you.
I carry you with me—
not as something broken…
but as something brave.

And I promise you this…

We are not going back.

We are going forward, together.

Love you always…..little girl!

NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR:

This piece came from a period in my life after a job loss that led me into deep personal work, including RTT hypnotherapy. During that time, my childhood stutter returned, which forced me to confront parts of myself I hadn’t fully processed. What started as trying to understand my past turned into a realization that the younger version of myself was still very present—and, in many ways, stronger than I ever gave her credit for.

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• About
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Lisa V

I never expected journaling to change my life. What began as a way to understand one difficult chapter became a journey into the stories that had been shaping me long before I knew they existed. When an unexpected career loss brought back my childhood stutter after decades of silence, I thought I was grieving a job. Instead, I uncovered deeper stories about worth, safety, belonging, and using my voice. Today, my journal poems explore the stories we inherit, the survival strategies we mistake for personality, and the courage it takes to question the beliefs we've carried for years. Through curiosity, reflection, and lived experience, I hope my words encourage others to see themselves with greater compassion and begin writing the next chapter on their own terms. Because sometimes the rescue doesn't begin when life falls apart. It begins the moment we stop abandoning ourselves.

Latest posts by Lisa V (see all)

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