You once told me that you loved me and I believed it would be forever. Why does time change the magic that two people spin together?
You sit by our small window and watch the clouds passing by. I sit watching you and perceive a sea of passion in your blue eyes, but not for me.
We would talk for hours but communicating has become painful of late. No more sharing thoughts and smiles. No more secret kisses when dinner guests aren’t looking. No more you. Your heart belongs to another and there’s nothing I can do about it. My spirit has been broken and I only have myself to blame.
You get up and move towards our bedroom and the smell of your longing for him has left a trail behind you.
I continue to sit and think about the void you will leave in my life. If only I had given you a chance to grow instead of moulding you into someone I wanted. I see now that my egoism has ruined something beautiful that can no longer be redeemed. My own creation has turned against me. “I’m damaged goods, stay away from me,” you’d said all those years ago. But I did not give up on you. I wanted to break the circle. I wanted the impossible. The darkness in your vacuous soul was illuminated and filled with my love and respect.
You turn and smile that ceramic smile of late. The certainty of our future reflects in your body language. It tells me that you are lost to me forever. It tells me that time has repeated its circle and some other poor soul will find himself at this point in the future. You close the door behind you and I shed another secret tear.
Valli Henry-Boldini hails from London but now lives in Venice, Italy. She is an educator, translator and vocal coach. Her writing began at an early age with diaries, poetry, lyrics then non-fiction/fiction. She is currently trying to write her autobiography. Her writing has appeared in Woman’s Weekly (Print version), Taste of the Caribbean and 101 Words Org to name but a few.