Office Space
written by: Aaron Grierson
Ah, office space
So perfect in formation,
The great container of wills
Of thoughts and motivation.
Let anarchy drip from the spreadsheets
Unto the minds of the innocent.
These mismanaged efforts
Underline lackluster
Structure collapsing within
Firm concrete walls.
To say nothing is golden,
Unless it’s a motivational quote,
Then you can meet the day
Or quota, at least
Since we all need a feel good-thought.
It helps us forget
For two seconds
All of our problems
That we complain about
Until VPN blocks it out
And we’re stuck,
Eyes to our phones
Until they take those away.
Morale isn’t necessarily moral
But it is necessary
Since dollars and cents are the bottom line
Where a stake holds more value
Than a steak in a roadhouse
No matter how many shares you own.
But please, take our satisfaction survey
Tell us how proud you are to be here
When you can’t be anywhere else
Despite working overtime in the attempt –
Don’t worry, it’s only required once a year.
Until the autumn, then they’re biweekly.
Something we were told is good for business.
When missives get massive
And your job’s processes change on the hour
You can’t keep up with simple emails
So inundated even your internet connection
Is getting PTSD
You know things are bad
So does your therapist,
And your wallet.
Misery loves company
Which is why it incorporated:
An amalgamation of
So many great ideas
Executed so poorly
It hurts to look at
But at least reputation can be bought.
Speaking of, have you bought tickets for month’s parking raffle?
The funds go to underfed executives!
- Office Space - June 8, 2026
- Hail to The Bus Driver - March 18, 2026
- Blood Moon - October 28, 2023
