Fear of Serenity
written by: Sanu Sharma
translated by: Suman Pokhrel
Why is this heart so serene?
why aren’t desires bubbling up?
why aren’t dreams taking flight?
why is this heart so quiet?
As if emotions have taken their leave
as if thoughts too have sought their rest.
I’ve been carrying this floundering heart—
always simmering, always aching,
yearning and thrashing
for countless ages.
But of late, it feels
as if this heart has fled from within me.
Why doesn’t it cry out, even when struck?
why doesn’t it writhe in the pursuit of attainment?
why is this heart untouched by the world around?
The eyes are un-moistened; that’s fine,
but why does no sigh of sorrow
slip from the lips of this heart?
I’m gripped
by a quiet dread
from this serenity of my heart.
NOVEMBER 2024 AUTHOR OF THE MONTH at Spillwords.com
Sanu Sharma is a Nepali language novelist, short story writer, poet and lyricist. She has authored seven novels, two collections of short stories, a collaborative collection of ghazals, and several lyrical works. Her writing addresses the challenges faced by women, girls, and marginalized people, shedding light on familial and societal issues that often go unexplored in literature, whereas her poetry and lyrics explore universal emotions. Sharma’s short story collection, ‘Ekadeshmaa,’ garnered acclaim and was shortlisted for the prestigious Nepali award, the Madan Puraskar, in 2018. Her novels and short stories have been adapted into audio and visual performances by numerous admirers. Many of her ghazals and lyrical writings have been set to music by various composers and performed by different singers. Her most recent book, a collection of short stories titled ‘Arko Deshma’ (translated as ‘In a New Place’), was published in April 2024 and has been shortlisted for major literary awards in Nepal: the Padmashree Sahitya Puraskar (Padmashree Literature Award) and the Kavidanda Rashtriya Aakhyan Puraskar (Kavidanda National Award for Fiction).
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