Loaded and Lonely by LunchboxRachel at Spillwords.com

Loaded And Lonely

Loaded and Lonely

written by: LunchboxRachel

@RachelMcLaugh

 

A soft glow
comes from my phone.
Wondering,
“Who’s it from?”

But, I know
it’s in my mind
because it’s past
your bedtime.

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, mind awake.

A soft rain
sends the day.
Run my hands
down your spine.

Sunrise
greets my eyes
only to find
a vacant bedside.

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, mind awake.

I’m aggressive, yet agonized.
Anxious, so I apologize.

Bashful and full of bliss
when I’m in your presence.

Bitter, you piece of shit.
Bored because I’m so cautious.
I’m grieving and guilty.
Happy for you but not for me.

Hysterical like an idiot.
You can’t rewind innocence.

Miserable and negative.
Paranoid, yet persistent.

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, mind awake.

Tell me what I’ve got to do.
How do I get to you?
Tell me what to prove.
Why so silent and so mute?

And I’m loaded and lonely.
I’m lovestruck for you, but you’re not for me.
So I’ve been concentrating on my confidence,
an incidental optimist…
Eyes closed, wide awake.

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