Debbie vs Jack Russell
written by: Jan Niebrzydowski
In this corner, is Debbie, goes by (Debbie the Dominator), standing at just a wee 4’ 8”, shoe – 2 ½ children’s size. Not many teeth (knocked out in previous bouts), but packs a wallop with her small toddler type hands. Don’t believe me, you say? She’s got her ways.
In the far corner, Jack Russell Terrier, goes by The Whelping Wild One. At barely 2’, 4 skinny legs, (shoe size unavailable) known for his sporty black neckerchiefs.
The World Federation has been following closely their grudge match at the infamous Backyard Fence. The Whelper (nickname) has claimed this as his frequent haunt to the dismay of many neighborhood riff-raff. The neighborhood watch dog has many times had to intervene for noise and rowdy behavior.
The Whelper is favored 5 to 1 over the Dominator as he has been practicing day and night. It is typical to hear his earsplitting harangue as late as midnight, whereas, the Dominator, has only been heard with a deafening discord during The Trolley song from Judy Garland and some Karen Carpenter tunes.
The two fighters’ now in position, Debbie, special needs, Jack, special breed. The Whelper, lets out the first bellow. At first, short shots, not much punch, quick and multiple. Debbie returns with equal amount of yell outs but a little louder. The second round finds the Whelper in rare form, coming out swinging with long drawn out whelps, piercing to the ear. Debbie slings back with guttural whelps but even meaner now.
A little heckling from the audience has everyone on edge. Looks like Debbie’s manager, Mom the Mutter, wants to call off the fight. She’s yelling over everyone now for the bout to be over. The crowd goes wild saying, “No, No, No” in chaotic unison.
We are up to the 5th round now and The Whelper’s whine is getting weak. The Dominator’s yell has picked up some steam and is really letting loose now.
“Yep, that’s it, folks, it’s a TKO. Debbie has done what few in the area have been able to do, silence the mighty Jack.”
The Jack Russell now mute, Debbie is approached for a comment.
“He wanted to scare me, didn’t he? Well, I said why can’t I scare him back?”
The crowd chants its agreement as Debbie’s manager pulls her off the stage with rebuke.
Debbie responds, “I don’t care what you say, I’ll scare him all I want.”
The crowd goes wild as it’s a double knock out for the champ. Stay tuned for information about upcoming fights.
- Chicago – Song of the City - July 6, 2024
- Debbie vs Jack Russell - April 20, 2024
- Christmas Caroling - December 17, 2023