Pausing in Grief
written by: Parvathi Jayakrishnan
Do you see my hair,
or do you see my eyes,
do you see my nose pin,
or do you see my smile,
or do you even see my face,
What do you see?
a label in an instinct,
a gossip you gather,
a personality you define,
a story you refine,
What did you see?
what did you like in me,
to hang me up here on your patio,
asking me to see the world,
or finally, telling the world to see,
or you see, what I see,
All this while,
kept inside a treasure box,
secured by the locks,
buried underground,
the scare about the judgments,
the ache of disapproval,
the love unrecognized,
the work unappreciated,
decades of darkness,
generation of opinions,
pushed to shut the life the heart beats for,
lost the sight of light,
yet rose to the touch,
on opening for a remembrance,
the only precious that survived,
from the ashes of passion,
You have no idea,
how beautiful I have turned into,
for no one can walk without staring at me,
a whole new world in front of me,
every being tuning their instruments,
and me, moving to their rhythms,
Those shades of charcoal,
that your mom sprinkled,
brought me to life,
and you asked me to breathe.
I don’t want to know,
of what you saw,
but those eyes that speak,
those lips that mumble,
the tears that roll,
the memories you hold,
the times you see right into my eyes,
the signature ink on my canvas, twinkles,
singing a story you never knew,
for life with mysteries,
is something that we all hold on to,
yet we search for the presence,
which never left in the first place.
- Pausing in Grief - July 1, 2024
- Perpetrator - June 1, 2023
