The Confession written by Rimli Bhattacharya at Spillwords.com

The Confession

The Confession

written by: Rimli Bhattacharya

@rimli76

 

My shoulders ached when I reached her.
I had a burden.
Burden from past, burden of the present.

“I am tired of my life, the enemy is my head”
I told her.

“I can no longer bear the burdens of my life”
I repeated.

The lady in her sixties listened to me.
Her sharp eyes fixed on me she told me
“I know the reason of your unhappiness.
But that is not your cure. It is a delusion.
No, I say it is a Mirage. You step on it as you had done before
You will return to me as a puddle of tears.”

I mumbled “It kills me sometimes, why are you so pessimistic?”

The lady in her sixties listened to me.
I continued –
“I feel like a cactus, no one is happy with me
They complain I chase men.
All say I am beautiful, then why do I chase?
Shouldn’t the man I am running after ask for my hand?”

The lady in her sixties listened to me.
Softly she said “Cactus strives in a desert –
The only living thing in a barren land.
You thrived so long in that desert, so survive some more.
Your time has not arrived. Do not run behind the mirage.
Show yourself grace. Beauty outward is noting without beauty inward.”

The lady in her sixties opened her diary for her next session with me.
She knew I will need her; I need her to run away from men
Run away from each man who had used and abused me.
No they did not abuse, I was the one who allowed the abuse.

The burden eased a little.

Leaving the burden at her doorstep I told her I will return next week
And more weeks to come.

She gave me the date which said “February 29”.
I agreed as I walked away from her leaving the burden at her doorstep.

Rimli Bhattacharya

Rimli Bhattacharya

Rimli Bhattacharya is a First class gold medalist in Mechanical Engineering from National Institute of Technology, an MBA in supply chain management. Her essay on mental illness in the anthology “Book of Light”, a nonfiction genre, was published with Speaking Tiger Publications, which created a furor in literature world. She writes for Several magazines, Times of India, Engineering Journals, Blogs and is also a trained Indian Classical Dancer, genre Kathak and Odissi.
She is based out of Mumbai, India.
Rimli has been awarded a Star Blogger by team Bonobology for her essay “Running a solo Marathon”.
Rimli Bhattacharya

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