My Black Strong Never Lover
written by: Aurora Kastanias
From my thoughts to my lips and in my veins,
I am sickly besotted with you, without you
I’m in pain. I crave for you from dawn to dusk,
Finding relief only in my slumbers, when I dream
Of others, not of you.
For you don’t pertain to my hours of darkness,
There are limits to what you can give. When you sleep
With me I don’t, I fidget and tremble, toss and turn
In bed as you flow right through me provoking shivers.
I hence lie without you, longing to awake.
When I do rise to the morning beams penetrating
My windows overpoweringly, my mind gallops towards
You commanding my feet to follow, my eyes to find you.
You are there. You are always there. Faithfully waiting
For me where I left you.
Your loyalty besieges me and I surrender to the smell
Of your strong black hot body, yearning for your taste,
Gulping your exotic essence to the last drop, smoking
Cigarettes before, during and after our ritual intercourse.
I say I love you, they are worried I’m addicted to you.
The last time we carelessly drifted apart, I was terrified.
Four days without you drove me insane, perennially drenched
In a cold sweat, devastated by stomach cramps and panic
Attacks, feeling ill beyond remedy. The doctor sentenced
I was suffering from withdrawal symptoms and I had to be
Strong. I ignored him and came running back to you
Promising I would never leave you again, toying with
Your powdery texture slipping through my fingers,
Inebriated by your vapours as your liquid substance
Produces that oh-so-familiar gurgling noise.
While studying for my BA in Business Administration, at an American University in Rome, I further got enchanted by 19th century existential authors as well as European ‘absurdism’ and the Theatre of the Absurd.
It was only after my MBA that I started writing more seriously, giving space to my true passions. In recent years I have written two existential novels in Italian. In recent months I have started studing astrophysics and writing poems in english, which finally brings me here.
- Amber Leaves - November 21, 2023
- My Sole Desire - August 18, 2023
- There’s a Hole in the Bucket, Dear Harry - May 1, 2023
