Reason To Be Sad
written by: Alyssa Brocker
@Atelgy
do you remember your first taste of loss?
when you realize we all can’t live forever,
that we all can’t love forever.
his name was Jack Peterson.
his sister found him, thinking he was just pretending,
and isn’t that what we were all doing in 9th grade?
pretending?
presenting our best selves?
and for what?
I didn’t understand why Jack did what he did all those years ago,
but
now I do.
I can fully understand why he chose not to endure the
torment
of
yourself.
from
the
inside
out.
when everything inside you hates everything about you,
what’s left?
what’s the fucking point?
if I never took another breath,
if I never spoke another word
what would happen?
would it be for the better?
would I never have to feel this way again?
Jack had his choice.
and I have mine.
but
what’s my reason to be sad?
he had the bullies,
the broken home,
all the reasons to be
sad.
what’s mine?
where’s my reason?
why do I feel like this if I have a great life?
is it really just a
chemical
imbalance?
or is it something fundamentally wrong with me?
is it in the family?
is it in the world?
are we all just walking around,
with fake,
plastic smiles,
and
a laugh that sounds like a
balloon
deflating?
where is the emotional support group for people with
nothing
to be
sad
about?
- Reason To Be Sad - June 10, 2020
- (ir)(rational) - March 16, 2019
- Without Him - January 30, 2018
