Winter of Life
written by: Vidya Venkataramanan
The rattle of the ceiling fan,
In the darkened room,
The mild hum of the
Air conditioner in the background,
Bore witness to the old man lying on the bed,
Defeated,
As sleep eluded him,
As it had for many a year.
He heard nothing,
His mind sinking
Into memories
Of yesteryears,
When he had commanded respect,
In every aspect,
Of his life!
Striking fear in the wife,
And grudging respect from the children,
Teasing from the siblings,
And respectful distancing from the colleagues,
Had made him a man of no nonsense,
An island in the stream of life.
As age withered him,
Nobody bothered with him,
For he had become
Silent,
Barely acknowledging the family,
Refusing to be drawn into conversation,
His responses, short and vague,
Ambiguous answers to pertinent questions!
An aggressive youth,
Was silenced into
Quiet,
The wife he once had in control,
Was now the aggressor!
Nobody knew what was the matter,
For this had become his daily reconnoitre!
A tear slipped out
Of his blurred eyes,
Ninety years and more,
Was his score!
Ne’er a doctor
Was at his door,
That was his forte by far!!
Poked at for his wary silence,
Prodded for his cowardice,
For insults and praise,
He brushed off with a foolish grin.
Where, earlier in life, he would have boxed
Every ear!
As a second tear raced to join the one,
And another,
Faster and faster
Did it flow.
He lay in silence,
Hearing nothing,
But his thoughts,
That trembled on
Wrinkled lips!
Nobody knew the pain
Of not hearing,
A vital sensory,
For age had robbed him of his hearing,
And he had withdrawn into the safety of his mind!
The silence within
And without,
Was without doubt,
Not a spiritual high,
But a saddened soul,
Shut out from life!
He couldn’t see
The divine plan
In spate,
He accepted this fate.
Reduced to this state,
Unable to hear the noise,
Of everyday life,
Refusing to use hearing aids,
As a matter of pride,
Reading lips,
Mouthing irritations,
Frustrations of unheard emotions,
Overtook the speaker and the listener.
He only heard the sound of silence
In his Twilight years,
In the Winter of his soul.
Frozen emotions,
Frozen feelings,
Frozen dreams,
That wouldn’t thaw!
A hell of its kind,
In his mind.
As the ceiling fan droned on,
And the air conditioner hummed,
Both unaware
Of the silence in his head,
And the wet pillow
That he had emptied his dreams into!
Spring,
Summer,
Autumn,
And it was now the
WINTER,
The final Frontier!
As life became quieter,
And faded into silence,
This wasn’t how it should end,
Was his last thought,
As sleep overtook
Grief.
Seasons come and go,
This too shall be so!
- Winter of Life - November 30, 2024
- A Moment in Time - July 24, 2024
- The Road Less Travelled - May 7, 2024
