A Desire of 'Self' Execution, poem by Kalpna Singh-Chitnis at Spillwords.com

A Desire of ‘Self’ Execution

A Desire of ‘Self’ Execution

written by: Kalpna Singh-Chitnis



When the head feels like a gourd —
I want to scoop out all that it holds.

Everything I once considered important
must be re-examined now.

I want to take out every fiber of my brain
and seeds of all my ideas to carve emptiness.

I want to feel hollowness and smell the scent
released from the execution of my ‘Self.’

I want to sit at my door and welcome autumn,
with a tealight candle flickering in me —

a little fire, enough to keep me warm,
yet not enough to feel the frost ensuing.

I want to watch ghosts and goblins pass me by, grinning at life,
and children excited for trick or treat in their colorful costumes.

I no longer care to fly like a witch with my broom,
or go door to door with my pail, knocking for candies.

I just want to sit out there at my doorstep like a pumpkin,
holding a lantern-lit in me, and feel — anything but important.

Kalpna Singh-Chitnis

Kalpna Singh-Chitnis

Kalpna Singh-Chitnis is a Pushcart Prize nominated, multiple award-winning Indian-American poet, writer, filmmaker, and author of four poetry collections. Her works have appeared in notable journals such as World Literature Today, Columbia Journal, California Quarterly, Indian Literature, Silk Routes Project at (IWP) The University of Iowa, Stanford University's Life in Quarantine, etc. Her works have been translated into fourteen languages. Poems from her award-winning book Bare Soul and her poetry film “River of Songs” have been included in the "Nova Collection" and the "Polaris Collection" Lunar Codex time capsules to go on the moon with NASA's "Nova-C lander missions to Oceanus Procellarum" in 2022 and "NASA VIPER rover mission to the Lunar South Pole" in 2023. A former lecturer of Political Science, she is also the Editor-in-Chief of Life and Legends, the Translation Editor of IHRAF Literary, and an Advocacy Member of the United Nations Association of the USA. Her forthcoming poetry collection
Trespassing My Ancestral Lands is in the making.
Kalpna Singh-Chitnis

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