Why is it human nature not to think about the words spoken and the pain they may cause? Have we as humans truly reached the point that we care for no one but ourselves? Do we really have to tear others down to make ourselves feel better? Why is it human nature to let words spoken and actions rendered influence us so?
These are questions I wonder on a regular basis. I ponder these questions from the stand point of a mother, a friend, a care giver, and yes as someone who has let others words or actions bring me down. I also view them from the stand point as a human who has spoken or hurt someone with her words or actions. No, it is not my desire to hurt or bring others down. Sometimes as a human we do not think about what we say or do and accidentally cause hurt to another. I am truly sorry to those I have hurt or may hurt. However, my apology or my wrongs are not the purpose of this writing.
I have heard we hurt the ones closest to us the most. We hurt those we love the most. Is this true? Why would we hurt the ones we hold dearest to our hearts the most? Why would we hurt anyone, even a stranger? Why would we choose to laugh or belittle another?
Why would we bully even as a child? Are we not all trying to make the most out of this thing called life? I am sure that my questions could be answered by some of the most famous psychologists in the world or by some of the brightest scholars, but their answers are not what I seek. Nor is their answers the reason behind this writing.
From the time we are born our personality starts developing. As infants, toddlers, and children we observe those around us and sometimes mimic. Yes, even as adults we observe others and sometimes find something we like or want to try and mimic those around us. As a mother, I have observed my toddlers mimicking my words or actions. How many of you have uttered a curse word only to have your toddler repeat it? Then you scold them and tell them that is a naughty word not to be repeated. As a mother I have watched my children come home from school and repeat an action or word that they learned from their friends. Were all of these things appropriate?
Where did their friends learn these things from? Who did they observe doing or saying these things?
I remember when my oldest was in first grade. He came home one day from school and sat in my lap to tell me about his day. He was squirming around in my lap and as we all know children have the boniest bottoms. Anyway, I asked him if he would not squirm so much because his bony bottom was digging into my leg. His response, ” Uh uh mommy, my bone is right here ” while he was patting the front side of his pants. As a parent, I was furious. What first grader learns this? However, my memories are not the point of this writing.
At this point, I imagine you are questioning what the point is in all of my rambling if you have not figured it out yet. Before I divulge that here are a few more things for you to ponder.
How many times in your life have looked upon another person and judged them? What? Are you shaking your head and saying that you do not pass judgement on another human? I call your bluff. Even the nicest person you know has passed some sort of judgement even if only in their thoughts. No we are not placed here as human beings to judge. What right do we have to say that another person is more or less that we are? What right do we have to judge because of ethnicity or sex? What right do we have to judge based on another’s beliefs or wealth? What right do we have to judge based on appearances? We all live and die. We all start as infants and those of us fortunate enough will live long enough to reach old age. Those of us who are lucky enough will not let the words or actions of another human torment us the rest of our lives.
As humans we experience many ups and downs. Most of them have some kind of connection to another human, whether it be someone we love or someone we do not know. We hear people say all the time, Smile it could brighten someone else’s day. This is true.
You may be the only person who smiles at that person the whole day. How does it make you feel when someone smiles at you?
How does it make you feel when someone congratulates you or when they compliment you? How does it feel when you make someone smile? How does it make you feel when you help another instead of hurting another? How about when someone is so down and you brighten their day just by listening instead of criticizing?
Why not take the time in this already hard enough life to be someones light? Why not hold your head high and smile at the world?
Why not be someones light? Why not know that you are more than what someone tells you that you are? Why not do your best to lift others instead of bring them down? Why be harder on yourself because other people want to criticize and hurt you?
Is this world not already complicated enough for us as humans? We all face our own demons and fight our own battles, the least we could do is let others know that they are not alone.
If this writing has done anything, I hope it has not bored you as much as it has made you stop and think. That was the purpose of this writing. It was to make you wonder ” Have I hurt someone with my words or actions ” or ” have I let someone know that they are cared for”? Have I been a blessing or a burden? ALWAYS ALWAYS think about your words and actions. NEVER be the reason for someones depression. I do not know about you but I would rather be the reason for a smile then the reason someone said ” I give up”.