The Barflies Lament written by Aaron Marchant at Spillwords.com

The Barflies Lament

The Barflies Lament

written by: Aaron Marchant

 

I deliver these lines as an earnest plea to whomever it may concern
that they may profit all who hear, and by my folly will learn
You may take them with a pinch of salt, or treat them with disdain
but I tell you from experience, don’t mix the grape and the grain
I say, don’t mix the grape and the grain

You can balance the pool cue on your head, you can juggle with the darts
you can hide the dominoes under your hat, but it’s certain to win you no hearts
You can close your ears to all reproach, but listen to my refrain
When it’s your turn to ‘get them in’, don’t mix the grape and the grain
old chap, don’t mix the grape and the grain

You can smile at the landlady’s daughter and suffer the landlords wrath
You can proposition your mother in law, and punch a man of the cloth
You can eat your fill of steak and chips and pie and quiche Lorraine
But whatever you have to wash it down, don’t mix the grape and the grain
my friend, don’t mix the grape and the grain

You may curse until your heart’s content, and smoke until you cough
You can dance with the chief constable, and knock his helmet off
You can hoist your trousers up a pole, to serve as a weather vane
But if you take a glass to keep out the cold, don’t mix the grape and the grain
not you, don’t mix the grape and the grain

You can have a Scotch and soda, or a vodka martini and lime
A dry gin and tonic will do you no harm, and a small rum and black will be fine
You may work your way through the wine list or drink beer ’til you fall in a hedge
But don’t mix the grape and the grain old chum, or you’ll wish you’d taken the pledge
Oh yes, you’ll wish you’d taken the pledge!

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