The Big Small Woman
written by: NL
Her eyes furrowed. Focused demonically onto me. She lowered to the ground. Bent her legs a little. Then out from the small woman came an impossibly infurious insidious screeching sound that could have only spawned from hell -OH MY GOD LEAVE THIS PLACE GET OUT OF MY HOUSE as she started taking small lunges toward me, suddenly stopping, starting again, raising her hand as if to slap me -DO YOU WANT ME TO HIT YOU?!
…
and in that brief moment of silence I could see that this small woman really wasn’t small at all, and that people really shouldn’t believe her innocent appearance. Big bangs that cover the forehead. Hair reaching the shoulders, curved out perfectly. Whites covered and dyed brunette to mask the aging. But although she was small, Here I was: quivering in her presense, heartrate climbing, unsure of her next move. I didn’t know what to do in that moment, and I had already jumped back from her advances. Would she hit her own child?
…
You’re crazy! I yelled back. I ran away before I thought she might hit me. Away and downstairs, and slammed the door on the way out.
…
I paced around outside, trying to get my heartrate back down, trying to keep my head from bursting off like the bullet from a gun or popping like a balloon. I decided to head back. I was calm at first. But then the thought came that it wasn’t right for her to do this and my legs agreed as I started sprinting off my anger as fuel.
But when I slammed my door in, marched upstairs- there she was again. Calm and indifferent as a rabbit. And then she asked me: would you like some dumplings I made? To which I hopelessly yelled that she cannot tell people to fuck off, to ignore them when she feels, give silent treatment, and then, Finally accept them in, When She feels ready. As if her attention and respect was a reward to be earned. At that she then screamed for me to get lost again.
- The Big Small Woman - May 5, 2026
