A Morning, poetry by Doug Stanfield at Spillwords.com

Saying Goodbye

Part XIX

A Morning

written by: Doug Stanfield (Hemmingplay)



I do remember certain things,
nine months later,
how it was a Sunday in
April, and the daffodils were late,
How the spring sun was out and
poured through the bay windows
happy and warm,
as though nothing was wrong…
as though everything was normal.

I can’t feel it now–the exhaustion
of that awful last night–
blessed by how the brain
softens things with time.

I remember
the Hospice nurse coming at dawn
to relieve me.
I stumbled downstairs, grateful,
leaned against the kitchen counter
beyond my limits,
glad to escape the sound.

Time was short, now.
The nurse said “She’s leaving us.”
I will call you.
Two hours passed, and the
nurse called
so I could
be there at the end.
She gave us time together.

And then, with sudden stillness
it was all over.

TOD: 8:24 a.m.

I opened the curtains to let
more sun in, confused by
a world outside that
didn’t seem to notice.

I touched her cold lips,
amazed at the quiet
and stillness the soul leaves behind.



Grief is something that can surprise you. Months can pass, and you’ll feel fine, and then you’ll see something, or hear a bird, or smell an aroma and any of these things can trip you up and drop you back into the need to mourn some more. I don’t remember what triggered this one, but it’s an example of the kind of thing that lurks just around many corners.

Doug Stanfield (Hemmingplay)

Doug Stanfield (Hemmingplay)

OCTOBER 2016 / JULY 2019 AUTHOR OF THE MONTH at Spillwords.com
“Hemmingplay,” is the pen name of Doug Stanfield, who grew up on a family farm in western Ohio, went with his parents for two years in Karachi, Pakistan, in high school and had lived, until recently, in Bellefonte, PA with his late wife, Wilda and their two sons, Ben and John. Doug was a writer, editor and director of internet communications at Penn State for 26 years. He has had a few disreputable occupations, including newspaper reporter and editor, and public relations flak, but is trying to make amends for his sins by writing poetry and fiction.
When his sons were safely off making their own mistakes, he turned on the computer one day, stared at the screen for what seemed a long time, and began to learn the craft anew at age 67.
Doug has published three books so far: "Mermaid Sisters: First Dive", a children's book on iTunes/iBook; "I Came From A Place of Fireflies" published as a paperback and Kindle on Amazon, and a new book of poetry, "Snowflakes & Ashes: Meditations on the Temporary”, available as both an ebook and as a paperback. (Gatekeeper Press) on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, iBooks, Ingram and Baker & Taylor, and a few others.)
Doug Stanfield (Hemmingplay)

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Series Navigation<< Giving Back, ReluctantlyEpilogue >>
This publication is part 19 of 20 in the series Saying Goodbye