It’s Complicated
written by: Anna Kinkead
She pondered the best time to tell him that she was leaving him. After a long day of Zoom meetings? Too cruel. Perhaps she should wait for a “good moment,” maybe over dinner? Some wine to help lubricate the conversational wheels.
They still loved each other.
A betrayal, then. Of sorts. She scornfully considered temptations of the flesh. Rushed heartbeats and chemicals. So tawdry, belonging to other people’s lives. Her own betrayals went deeper, down to the soul, sharing of vulnerability and weaknesses. Close behind, the implicit accusations. Her inner child pleaded that it wasn’t her fault. “Because you weren’t there for me!” and “You abandoned me!” Triggering back to the secrets of her childhood.
Her decision to leave had been building silently. In its wake, a crushing feeling in her chest; breath and emotions suffocated equally. Too cheerful, dangerous, he’ll misread it as contentment. Careful, looking sad, might invite the conversation she dreads. A dangerous knife-edge of fear. Her words will break him, his face flashing from youthful to haggard. This man with whom she had nurtured and cherished their children. No room for regret here. Just sadness that she had to choose between his face, and her own slowly-dying soul. Closing the door, her heart is heavy, but her spirit soars.
- It’s Complicated - June 4, 2026
- From My Balcony - February 10, 2026
