This entry is part 4 of 5 in the series Without Reason
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natural disasters

written by: Alyssa Brocker

@Atelgy

 

Natural Disasters by Alyssa Brocker at Spillwords.com

 

i know what you want now

and 

it isn’t me

 

 

some people leave your life

and you have to let them

 

i just…

 

 

don’t know what i want 

 

Natural Disasters by Alyssa Brocker at Spillwords.com

 

and i can’t ignore 

the 

ache 

 

      between       
my                     eyes
because 

when i say your 
name that’s where it 
resides

 

 

memories are only there when i’m lying in bed, wearing your t-shirt, clutching my purple pillow, 

wondering when,
if,
i’ll fall asleep

 

love isn’t 

 

50/50

 

Natural Disasters by Alyssa Brocker at Spillwords.com

 

i hate you for the bad times,

but 

even more for the good

all my friends are sick of hearing your name
almost 
as much as i am of saying it

and i spend most of the time in my room remembering when i would lie awake and stare at 

 

 

you 

 

Natural Disasters by Alyssa Brocker at Spillwords.com

 

i remember screaming at you in the car

 

angrier than a hurricane

 

caring about you,

about us,

 

because isn’t that how you know you love someone?

caring so much until you’re out of words and you sit staring at a picture all day thinking about the color of someone's eyes and how you’ve never seen something like it before and how you want to see nothing else ever 

 

 

again 

 

Natural Disasters by Alyssa Brocker at Spillwords.com

 

but you love someone else now and i don’t want to think about it

 

so,

i’ll just think about that day in the city in my pink dress

 

and your shoes that never matched 

 

and i’ll hold my breath when i walk by your work,

 

wondering if you’re there behind that red open sign

 

 

wondering if i’ll say

 

                                                                                                                                  hi

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Alyssa Brocker

Alyssa Brocker

2016 AUTHOR OF THE YEAR at Spillwords.com
Alyssa Brocker is a twenty-year old college graduate.
She found her love for poetry by working with her theater group to create an original play written in prose.
She lives with her beloved dog who is always her first reader.
Alyssa Brocker

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